DefCon 97:

This year TDYC! went in force...well if you call about 20 people a force. We all found our own ways to the con from the different locations throughout the country. I personally flew in from Denver, Co with Relix and Shadowlark. We arrived at the airport in Vegas around noon. We hooked up with Truecynic, Knarph and Courtnee at that time. We were supposed to hook up with Aychbee but none of us knew what he looked like, didn't bother setting up a meeting place, nor did we even know how to pronounce his nick properly. We didn't even know his real name...shit...we still don't. So...we walked around the airport yelling out his nick improperly and making an ass of ourselves. After about 45 mins of this we decided to just head on over to the hotel. When we arrived at the hotel we met up with Soulzero, Crash, NoX, fruity, and a few other ppl who's names excape me at this time. After sitting around on our asses for a while the hotel finally let us register and we moved into our rooms. During this same time, most of us registered for the con.

After we all moved into our rooms and fruity literally tore the dresser off the wall in order to gain 13 phone lines, we headed on down the strip to Carrows for lunch. During this time, I ordered a vanilla milkshake and perceeded to either make everyone sick or get my ass kicked by licking the cream off the top. fruity was mezmorized by the whole thing and made me start laughing...and ShadowLark was on the ball and got a picture of me laughing...thus the sick cum shot looking picture on the page. Of course proving any of this to any of you out there is damn near impossible...

Anyways, after lunch, we all went back to the hotel and met up at my room to break out with the shirts since they were tired of me bugging the hell out of them. Can I just say that the shirts roked!!! Thanks to NoX and TrueCynic for the shirts, webba for the graphics, and fruity and myself for the lame ass slogans. Once we had our shirts on we headed down to the convention hall. We literally could feel the attention in the room pan our way when we walked on...my guess is that people were thinking, who the hell our these posers??? Dark Tangent came almost running up...actually I couldn't tell since I was facing the other way. He was like, right on, you guy's made it, I was wondering if you were gonna show. I was like, who the hell are you..except I said it in a nice ass kissing way probably something like 'i'm sorry, who are you?' and of course, once I found out who it was the ass kissing got rather deep. I was like, I'm Rev. Krusty and he said I know...which just scared the shit out of me. Anyways, we found a place and perceeded to watch the events for the evening. We found infoz on a scavanger hunt that we figured would be a whole hell of a lot of fun and made plans to meet up with PbS and company a little later in the evening.

I truely don't remember much of the rest of the first night other than PbS and others showed up around 10 and Aychbee showed up later on.

On Saturday I remember waking up at around 10'sh when NoX called and woke Crash Up...oh yea...there was so much crap going on in the room down stairs that Soulzero and Crash crashed in my pad upstairs. Like NoX showed up shortly later for some reason or another and I got my ass up and took a shower. I met up with everyone else and we headed on down to the con to see what was going on. During the corse of the day fruity and aychbee hooked up with penguino and started to rack up points for the scavanger hunt. They showed her the 13 lines they leached out of the wall and fruity slapped a sticker on his nipple stating that his nipple was owned by penguino. (anything for points i guess). I could have sworn his nipples were mine. I hooked up with DT sometime that day and asked him if it was legal for us to spot a staff member as a fed...his reply was 'WHO???'...i only told him we were still gathering infoz and didn't want to say yet. About this time, fruity hooked up with me and drug me off to the rest of the group who was waiting at the elevators. Right before the elevators, fruity tried to stop me and grabbed my hair and I let out a huge ass yell...everyone freaked and started shh'shing me. It took me a bit to figure out why...I think it was when I heard faint quacking sounds... We proceded up to my pad and put the duck into my bath tub...it appeared that spec found a place in town that sold ducks and one of the things in the scavanger hunt was a live duck. God help us...a duck...in my bath tub. fruity stated that the ducks name was jimmy the hotdog vendor. (jimmy now resided at the duck pond in Yuma, Arizona.)

A little later on we brought penguino up to my pad not telling her what we wanted validated. We walked in the door and I told her it was in the bathroom...she slowly went in and looked in the tub. The duck was hiding behind the curtain and all she saw was the shit on the bottom of the tub and she yelled 'What the fuck are you guys doing in here???'...aychbee moved the curtain back and she then said..' oh my gawd...it's sooo cute'. She then proceeded to bribe us with more points if we took the duck onto the con floor and get our picture taken with it...we settled cheap with 10 points...the duck was already scared shitless...

Sometime after that the founding members went on down the McDonnalds for lunch and a meeting. We had been needing a meeting to discuss the future of the group for sometime...we spent like 3 hours talking and for the life of me, I don't remember shit of it. About the only thing I remember is a quote from fruity when I said, who takes over as president if I die or something...and I quote 'shit...we disband the group, I don't want to have to do the damn web page'. anyways...after the meeting, we all headed back down to the con and listened in on a few of the talks, and other crap that was going on. Soulzero and a few others went down to the quake competition but all they had was a linux box runing tcp/ip and not ipx/spx...and the ppl running the competition didn't know or were too lazy to switch from ipx to tcp. As we were growing closer to the evenings festivities, we were talking about the party we had been wanting to do for a long time. unfortunatly, fruity never got off his ass (normal) and didn't get the party room setup. So we finally decided to have only a small one with like tdyc ppl only. SOMEONE decided to put our room number on the party board and everyone and their sister kept showing up. We were trying to figure out what to do. Someone said that sev3n invited our ass's over to his party on one condition, we bring women over who would do bondage shit with him...we looked around, and wondered if fruity in a dress would work. we figured not. The rest of the night is a little fuzzy ...not to drinking on my behalf, but I think to lack of sleep as I did not sleep a wink all night... Everyone else got perty sloshed save relix. Daveh showed up (kewlio dude from berkeley) and after telling us the history of UNIX and BSD, also got perty damn sloshed...at which point he made absolutly no sense. (I'll leave out the flirtations with underaged women and hands being down pant's). Around 7 in the morning, everyone had crashed save me. Daveh had finally headed out...god knows where (apparently his alive). I headed upstairs and decided that taking a shower with a duck might be a bad thing...especially since I am perty sure the duck was gay...he had that sparcle in his eyes.

I headed down to the con floor several hours early...trying to keep awake, I ended up talking with a bunch of other ppl who I believe were in the same boat as I. We talked about our first computers and how awsome they were at the time...TI994A's and shit like that. After getting thoroly scared I headed back upstairs and tried to wake ppl. We were all supposed to get up at like 10 and be down at the con with the duck. Of course, hardly anyone woke up. So what few we had who were alived headed down stairs. I had given Dark Tangent a tdyc shirt the day before and he told me that he'd wear it today...well, he forgot. I was like, ahh man...dissed...he told me he'd go get it on and that he'd forgotten. I also told him that we wanted to spot our staff member as a fed and that we would give 'him' a little warning to prepare himself. I think it took him a few to catch on that it was him that we were spotting...like an hour and a half later he was about ready to start the show. He announced that in like 2 mins the stuff would start and that he had to go get his tdyc shirt on. We yelled a little and he told us to get our ass up their and explain what tdyc was...well...I said, can I spot you now? ...he reluctantly said yes but he didn't have any shirts...I told him..fuck the shirts, we were just gonna rip it up anyways. (figured we'd take one shirt and make strips so each of the members could wear part of it). 10 mins of going through the list and the audiance agreed that DT could not defend himself. DT then asked me to tell the audiance what tdyc stand for...so I went through that list...the duck you caught, that dick you crave, that damn yogert company...etc...after that was done, we rushed off to check out of our rooms.

the rest of the day was weird...as I fell asleep on the chairs at the back of the con hall...supposidly blowing kisses in my sleep or something like that...damn jail bait...they'll give you wet dreams every damn time. SZ and company left sometime...(brain farts galore here)...the rest of us left later that evening after finally seeing DT sporting the shirt I gave him. (think it was like after 4 or something)...poor guy got harrased for wearing it too...geez some ppl...you go to a hackers convention to have fun, meet people, learn some shit...we as a group did all that...and especially the fun part..and someone harrases the guy who runs the convention for sporting one of our shirts...oh well...such is life. we can't help it if were lame...

there's more stuff...can't remember it all at this time...I will be putting together the Dark Tangent the Fed page sometime soon as well as the acronym page for tdyc.

quick notes: things out of order...saturday night sometime we went and saw MIB...fruity and I freaked out some oriental chick on the escalators at the mirage (don't ask what we were doing). someone dumped a trash can full of soap water onto our balcony when we were all out there smoking and drinking...(kewl)...and then dropped the trash can after it (sucked). We won second place in the scavanger hunt and then refused it..we wanted no less than last place..

I'll add more later...

Rev. Krusty